WALMART

You just have to love Walmart! First, anything that you can't find in a Walmart store, you probably don't really need.  Earlier today, I went to Staples looking for something that I thought surely an office supply store would have, but left disappointed that not only did they not have what I was looking for, they couldn't even order it for me.  Now everyone knows that if you can't find what you want where it should be, go to Walmart.  Not only did I find what I was looking for, I found it in less than five minutes.

Ok the truth is that I also go to Walmart for the entertainment value.  Whenever I'm having a bad day, I make it a point to stop by any Walmart store.  Now before you start to think I've lost my mind, consider this!  Each and every time that you go to Walmart, I promise you'll see at least one person who will make you laugh.  No, I don't mean chuckle, I mean Laugh.  It's almost as though they hire people just to show up looking silly so that the rest of us can have a good laugh.  Before people go to Walmart, the girls have to make sure that they have on something that shows off the maximum amount of fat on their bodies, (preferably by wearing the rump shaking booty shorts) and the guys want to ensure that you can clearly see the crack of their asses and their bellies.  The black guys want to make sure that they have their gold tooth in, and that he has found the fattest and ugliest white chick on the planet.  In fact she has to be so fat and ugly that some white guy takes one look at her, and turns to his buddy and says "we should thank him for taking her off the dating market".  I know that some of you think I'm being mean, but let's face it, if you've ever been to a Walmart, you've thought the exact same thing.

The further south that you go, the greater your chances of getting multiple laughs on your trip to Walmart.  About a month ago, a group of us went to a Walmart in NC, and while we sat in the vehicle waiting for the one guy brave enough to enter, we spent the 15 full minutes laughing at the folks walking past.  Now just when I thought I had seen the wackiest people I could see, my wife and I take a trip to SC.  My mother in-law only has basic cable, which isn't very interesting, so I decided to head over to the local Walmart and check out the sights.  First I saw a black chick with the Rump Shakers on, she had 3 gold teeth and yes you guessed it, she also had blond hair.  I'm laughing now, just thinking about her!  Next up was the guy who weighed about 150 pounds with the girl who was about the size of a Japanese Sumo wrestler.  They seemed very happy, especially her with the jumbo size cheetos in one hand, and a half gallon of ice cream in the other hand.

I know that some will not find the humor in what I've written today, but I'm Just Sayin, you can't make this stuff up.